In My Defense
by blacklabel34
Summary: Post R2. Slightly AU.spoiler rcasm-parody. "Q1, My name is Lellouch vi Britannia, the 11th prince, the Demon King, Zero, The sole ruler of the world. In my defense, I am absolutely NOT gay!This is truly false accusation with no bases of reasoning and logics. " -Twisted idea,for mature reader only. no smut. An over-exaggerating story for the overdramatic Lellouch! R


…

**DISCLAIMER :**** I DON'T OWN CODE GEASS. IT BELONGS TO SUNRISE/BANDAI co AND CLAMP**

**Author Note :**

_**Don't believe what you read! What you read is impossible and irrational, just for fun purpose only. You guys can differentiate between what's possible and impossible, right?**_

**Post R2. Slightly AU. A what-ifs-story with flavour of parody. **

**Non sense fictions. Odds. Twisted. Angst. Not suitable for under-age reader (not for under 17 y.o).**

_**Crack. Stupid. for fun. Sarcasm-parody. **_

"_**I am Lelouch vi Britannia, I, the 11**__**th**__** prince, the Demon King, Zero,the Ruler of entire Nations, and I am certainly not gay! This is truly false accusation with no bases of reasoning and logics." O.o **_

_**OooO**_

_**Prologue :"In My Defense"**_

_**OooO**_

-[PRESENT TIME]-

'My Name is Lelouch Vi Brittania, 11th prince of Brittania, Zero the Knight of Justice, The Demon King,

The sole ruler of the world.

To Kallen Kouzuki, Q1, a friend,

A perfect shield and sword, a perfect knight,

A perfect woman,

,

Q1, I assume I am no longer in this world when you're reading this.

I believe CC wouldn't fail me to deliver this to you.

Well, how could I end up humiliating myself this way, telling you tales I'd love to forget? It is indeed a big mystery. That must be, because you've tricked me already, Q1, to _love_ you. As I had always been depended to you for the whole times ; A role that should be reversed, in fact. It was me, who should've protected you all the time, not you.

I just want to tell you this…

,

In my defense, for my irrational behaviours, and not to think that most rational ways I used to,

and how _I refused _to succumb into false accusations.

Just because I am _too magnificent.'_

Kallen Kouzuki opened pages by pages that thin book and her eyes opened wide in shock.

_**OooO**_

_**OooO OooO**_

**="In My Defense"=**

_And, what could a 17 years old boy do, really ?_

_To destroy the world and create a new one, of course._

_+++================XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX======================+++_

-[Before Zero Requiem]-

_This is insane!_

Lelouch Vi Brittania's world as if had collapsed entirely when he heard how Nunnally, his centre of life, his very reason to live, to breath, even found and led a rebellion organization, and killed almost all of his family just to create a gentle world for her, his precious little sister, the fair-shimmering gems of innocence, told to be…_ death._

He just wanted to throw away his mask of Zero, and yes, he did that, and _ran_. He ran cowardly, like a dumb teenage-girl in_ her _periods. So lame. So dumb. Unlike the rational, unbeatable chess game experts, the cold-hearted yet genius master of manipulation he used to be. Thankfully, Q1 was there for him and slapped him. Yes, slapped him, _literally, _the weak and coward Lelouch Lamperouge, a teen in his 17, a mere school boy, ….So young, fragile, unstable, and _idiot._ Not some kind of hero, not some kind of nobleman, not the eleventh heir of the throne; Completely coward and powerless.

"comfort me, _with _your _body_, Kallen.", he looked at her with the looks he had never expressed before.

Of course, the girl was hurt and slapped him. And he got _zero_ satisfaction.

Suicidal attempt was in store.

-But then… _delayed. _

It needed to wait. Because he got a rebellion to lead, a cause to fight for, and of course, he got his people waiting for him, for a kind of hero to end up this miserable world and create a much more splendid one. The Gentle World. None would be devastated anymore. Zero was a symbol of peace and freedom after all.

That was why he continued.

He _didn't know_ that time. He _hadn't found out_ about _it_.

And then, when his precious little sister, found to be _alive_, yet, was in the arms of Schneizel and the others, saying how she _despised_ him.

All of Lelouch's world entirely shut down. Not to mention the betrayal of Black Knights and…the cruel fact how Charles and Marianne, -_Marianne!for God Sake!_ His beloved mother he thought to be the tragic victim, the fundamental reason why he grew big hatred toward his father, kingdom, and origins, was _all along_ conspired with his father. So, everything he believed was a lie. The reason he lived for, was a _lie._ Fake.

"You are my enemy from now on, brother. I will do anything to stop you.", Nunnally's words, in the same soft-melodious-voice were too cruel.

Nunnally, the new viceroy of Japan, his precious little sister, the reason he killed so many people, the reason he lived, in fact, despised him. Cruel. Cruel. But, he had too many masks. None knew the truth except for the _witch. _Not even his beloved Nunally. He just needed to endure and really turned himself to be a complete villain.

With all of the Black Knight knew his identity, and betrayed him, he was alone and truly in big emotional distress. He needed a bigger plan. He had started this, so he was obliged to _end this._ No excuse of whatsoever. Yet, he tended to over- reacted recently. And it's not good, because the winner was always be the calmer one. Just like Schneizel, when _they were kids._

He shouted a lot, yelled in frustration and almost always angry all the times, and of course, his emotional was really turned up-side down these days.

Just like women.

How he despised the idea. The very weak creatures, while he, was in fact, the great, great, Lelouch vi Brittania, the 99th emperor-would-be, Zero, the CEO of Black Knight, Demon King, who had control all over the world. Absolute power.

Absolute ruler.

A dictator.

He _knew_. He found out in that day when he defeated Charles zi Brittania. Times that he had forgotten…. became vivid. As the man died by his hand, apparently his geass's effect on him was cleared. He _remembered everything_, including tiny fact that his sub consciousness trying desperately to forget_. _The blurry events after the cave-scene, when he was eventually handed to Charles, his father, rather than shot to die by none other than his _best friend._

This was the most humiliation a prideful-arrogant man like him could stand.

What he did to him…

_False accusation, huh? _

_Now it had become some kind of ill-jokes. An irony._

A mere experiment, which was really immature. Charles, that mad person was indeed crazy,

_Utterly lack of common sense. _

Mad. Insane. Imbecile. Even his sense of humour was really absurd and sick.

Then he manipulated his memory, Suzaku's memory, Lyold, and probably everyone's involved.

_Did you think I'd crack? Huh? That is where you're wrong, Father._

[flash]

"so?", Lelouch's violet eyes were intimidating. Yet calm. "what is it, _now, _Suzaku_?_"

"I've…I've- found out. you- ?! well! _I-_ _truth_- I-_I _-"

"if you lost at words, don't even try to have an audience with me. _Privately. Who do you think you are? _I am your Emperor, I am no longer old Lellouch you knew. Show some respects."

"L-Lelouch!, that time- and- _you-_?"

Lelouch saw where this conversation led to, so he interjected, "-_enough! _Don't even try to start. It is the most disgusting thing, and it _is truly irrational, _doesn't make any sense, the theory itself doesn't exist. It's so disgusting and irrational that wrecked any logics, wrecked my mind even to try to think about it. I refuse to know. It will not happen in normal life, so don't even think and assuming things. Leave, now!"

"But-Lelouch?! Is it…"

"Dismiss, now,Suzaku Kururugi!", Lelouch commanded.

"Y- _yes_, Your Majesty. As you wish, Your Majesty."

[end of flashback]

Yet, he had not lost his cool. He had not lost his touch. He was still that great, and he was going to make a perfect ending of this madness. Yes, a perfect end, after all, he had ascended to the throne according to his plans, and became the sole ruler of the world, - _yes,_ he just need to pull out the last trick as redemption. The plan would have to be done, run smoothly… _Perfectly._

'just laugh everyone. But in the end, I, Lelouch, will be the one who smiles in the end. A perfect victory.', he thought, while punching the table to express his frustration and anger.

"….are you alright?", a monotone-yet-sweet voice of a lady was heard.

A petite beautiful figure appeared just by the door. "I thought I heard some noise. Finally crack, huh? I thought you _were that great._"

His scowled and solemn face switched swiftly into a much confidence one, an arrogant and mischievous one, his favourite coverage, as he said, "shut up, Witch! pretend to care about me, now?", he smirked.

"… you're the one who's pretending here, Lelouch." It was very rare of her to show any kinds of affections. But this time, that stoic feature made a gentle gesture, although still expressionless. She approached him in sincere, held his hand. A big surprise for him. He let down his 'mask' and fell into complete solemn state, in overdramatic way like usual, with scowl, face buried to his hands.

CC was subtle. But she cared. She did not know when precisely she really _did_ care about the boy, who supposedly just a tool to accomplish her own one selfish wish.

"I'm tired, CC. really am. I just want everything to end. Soon."

"of course, Your Majesty", she leaned her back to his now. Sitting there, back to back, in silence, tried to support him somehow. A habit she picked nowadays.

"…..so, the Zero Requiem, huh?", CC stated. She decided just to play along, like she did in these past weeks. As if she hadn't known anything. The last thing that the Great Lelouch vi Brittania, the 99th emperor, the absolute ruler, the Demon King , wanted was to be exposed about his weakness, and he certainly did not want to feel weak and miserable, nor he pleaded for pity or sympathy. In fact he despised them. The man carved for respects and control over all things after all.

_Of course. I f I must die, I will die in extravagant way._

_In grandiose._

_And with a cause._

_A good cause._

"…..this is end, huh? I expected you to grant my wish, Lelouch."

Lellouch smirked. "Yes. Do you regret now, giving me the geass that I cannot fulfil your wish, Witch?"

"no."

Thank you, CC. My beautiful shield. You are always beautiful to begin with, and dependable, always there when I need you at most. "I am sorry I cannot grant your wish, CC. I, thank you for everything.", he looked at her and wished to kiss her, but successfully contained himself. He knew the best. He just had to push everyone away from him. He needed to push everyone away, or he'd be crumbled and torn.

Silence.

_I love you, CC. But it's not necessary to say that now, nothing to accomplish_. "I really wish you were My Queen." _that is, the final confession. It's enough, before I die._

"Queen? how about Kallen then?"

"I wish that she's…my court lady.", he smirked.

"you're unbelievable."

"it _is_ old tradition for an Emperor to have many ladies. So it's not surprising. Well, I think I should treat you as many as pizza you want, since this is…finally the end, CC."

CC didn't buy his joke, she was expressionless, and asked, "…so, how are you handling things?"

"what?", he still put a flat face as if he wasn't bothered. _What? she knows?! What? She KNOWS MY secret?!_

"everything's turned out this way.. are you alright? About the requiem too, are you sure about it? Just in two days-"

Lelouch narrowed his eyes. "stop pretending! Camouflaging things! How smart you are with your words! You know, right? I know _what you're actually want to talk about_, witch! I know what I am doing _right now!_", he screamed furiously. "and you told Suzaku, didn't you? about _it?_" All the moment broke. And he now pushed her away. "get out! Get out, you , witch!", his eyes were full of anger. "Don't you forget about _your_ place! Our relationship is just a mere of contract! And you- are powerless without your geass. You're a code, CC. don't forget your place! Obey me! I am _the Emperor!"_

"…Fine, _Your Majesty_.", she didn't bother to argue.

Cold and stoic as ever. Beautiful CC had always been like that. No trace of anger in her. She just exited the chamber quietly.

She decided to play along. To save any traces dignity left in him.

Because she too, loved that person. The feeling was actually mutual. CC knew that Lelouch had always been an emotional type with sets of masks that always successfully covered his _emotions_ perfectly. But his true self? His true self…. only she's the one who had always seen that side. Not even Nunnally nor his friends back at Ashford. The emotional, over-dramatic one…. Kind of immature in the same way. Kallen and Suzaku were just victims of his never ending lies and camouflages, and of course, Rollo was also one of his victims. And with that _thing_ happened to him, his mood swings became much more apparent. He'd much become that emotional type. She knew what happened to him. Still, she chose to be loyal by his side. That Demon King everyone now hated and feared, who always looked that graceful, high-and mighty outside, was actually crumbling inside and lost. But he, of course, being that all glorious and high-mighty type, refused to admit it. And nothing could hinder his already built-plan, not even _himself._ He had planned it all along before he killed Charles. It would be a pity, if these whole years, even the birth of Zero long ago, were all tarnished in vain.

That morning, a day before Zero Requiem, Lelouch felt terribly sick. He vomited several times. These weeks had been worse, and now it was the worst. He was truly devastated…

-_Yet_, for the Gentle World where Nunnaly could smile…

He'd manage.

_Yes, I-, for Nunnally…_

He hid everything, and he managed really well.

CC was standing outside, hearing the sounds of water flowing from the tap water.

"are you alright?", she asked. "you're clearly exhausted."

Lelouch finally went outside with a confidence smirk, "you sure are lack of vocabularies these days, Witch.", he refused to appear weak and then took his leave.

"…you're pale."

He was pale. He was tired. He was sick.

"just your imagination."

"want me to remove it? Probably I could do something."

"_probably? _don't you ever try, witch. My life's at stakes here. I won't die in a silly way. If I die, all of my perfect plan will be shattered. " _how could she found out anyway?_ Even he just found out recently."you really are a witch, CC.", he muttered.

"…want to run away instead? Forget the requiem. I'll follow. This world is vast.", CC said instead, in her usual monotone voice. "Your Majesty.", she added.

"YOU! Don't ever try to DISOBEY ME or TELLING ME what to do!", Lelouch pushed her in anger, eyes wide and ready to burst up. "…_forget it._", he said that instead of apologize, and just shrugged and released her. She was just too precious that he wouldn't want to hurt her.

CC followed him in quiet.

And there they were, the three of them. The King, his sword, and his shield. Lelouch was in his white-emperor-regalia, stood there proudly in the midst of that beautiful garden. CC stood next to him. And of course, the source of his miserable weeks these days was also there, Suzaku Kururugi, the only knight who was really loyal to him right now, without any kind of manipulation nor geass. His best friend. That dumb person whom Lelouch wished to be Nunnally's guardian since they were little kids. And Lelouch still hoped that would work. Her precious Nunnally…. …._.right, _only Suzaku could protect her. Suzaku was a good man, unfortunately a bit twisted in some ways. But Lelouch could fix this. The one who would protect his precious Nunnally when he's not there anymore, would be him. It was his own fault anyway, _that_ Suzaku Kururugi's fault, in which Nunally grew up to adore him. That's, even little Lellouch who unbelievable dense, knew it.

"So…..Suzaku Kururugi, Knight of Zero, I ask you once more, will you do it without fail?"

Suzaku was stiffened. "…Yes, Your Majesty." He was sad and confused, and he certainly did not like the idea. But he could cover his emotions really well. He'd be loyal to whatever His Majesty- no, _his best friend-_ had decided. And he trusted him and his plan for the better world. _The better world._ This was redemption for a man who killed his own father.

"let's go, CC.", Lelouch was leaving.

"..L_-Lelouch_!", Suzaku was hesitated, "umm, I mean.. Your Majesty-"

Lelouch looked at CC, and CC then excused herself in silence.

"why?!Your Majesty, _why?_"

"drop the formalities if it's bothering you that much, Kururugi."

"today…."

"the final day, yes. But I don't regret. You- _better_ remember our promise."

"but! I don't think this is how it should end, Lelouch! Why should I kill you?!"

"don't you remember? _I _kill Euphemia! Your princess you sworn to protect, your lover! my innocent sweet-sister! And Shirley? His father? All that Japanese? My families? All those Britannians? You should hate me. In fact you did _try _to kill me, why hesitate now? I just grant you another wish, don't I? Now I believe nothing to discuss anymore, Kururugi. Just be sure you do my last order."

"….."

"..and please, _Suzaku_, protect Nunnally. Promise me that."

"…I am sorry, Lelouch…for… everything."

"what? You _should _hate me!"

"…do you hate me because of _that_?"

"you have paid the price. You saved me and agreed to help me. End of discussion."

"…without that, I'd still save you and turn to your side. I had no memories, I knew nothing, but I still went saving you facing the Late Emperor, didn't I? I hated you for killing Euphy, but somehow… I understood you."

"And I could never hate you, you were my only friend. My best friend."

"why don't you try to live then? Together, there is nothing we can't accomplish! That was what you said! Please….live, Lelouch. At least, for the child?"

"you're disgusting as ever! I expect you to love Nunnally, can't you understand?! Why are you so dense? I am a straight person! And _you are a straight person, Suzaku! _in fact you _love Euphemia!_ You love her, remember?! You love _Euphemia, _and _will_ love Nunnally once she grows up splendidly!" he's totally angry now. "and that _thing,_ do I need to remind you that disgusting thing is a cruel way of you revenging Euphemia's death? You hated me so much, you despised me, that's why- why-"

He lost his cool and started to tremble in pure anger.

"and Lyold was just a sick scientist.. as sick as my father, that insane Charles! And that geass, which I don't even know what's the name of its user is… casted on me…he's probably just another Rollo that Charles fabricated! And now I- I- _Don't you dare to humiliate me!_I command you to stop to humiliate me!"

It's not geass. It's just how he spoke. He really was a man of pride, a control freak.

Now Lelouch's voice became calm and he had regained his usual calm and graceful demeanour, "everything is just lies, and nightmare they created to mess up with me, but I could manage. You could too. Farewell then, my friend."

"…. I…..I love you, Lelouch. That is _not_ lie."

That won Suzaku a _very_ rare punch of the almighty king Lelouch vi Britannia, right to his face. _"_I think you need that to wake you up, Suzaku. ….I'm tired, I'll take my leave now._"_, Lelouch turned away and leaving.

"I love you.", he confessed. "I thought I loved Euphemia, but, I've known you much longer than I've known her. I just never… admit it, because it's-"

"_what?", _Lelouch laughed a devil-maniac laugh like he used to. "_what? _what did you say? That is where you _wrong_, Suzaku. I don't know about your part, but I am 100% straight. I know that there are some false accusations of me being you know g- _well_, have a slightly different sex orientation. But no, I am not that kind of sick people. This thing….. is mocking me. I maybe cursed with your child right now, but I am assuring you, I am _normal_. _I…-_ I love CC. Yes, I adore her. She's irreplaceable. She's_….. well_, if it was a happier ending, I pictured her as my Queen. And Kallen, a perfect consort…a strong beautiful lady with unique charms… Well, just be nice to her… I know you clashed each other too much, almost killed each other in every encounter, but Kallen ….. yes, I'd like to see both of you work together."

Lelouch vi Brittania didn't know that somewhere near that place, CC was listening. She watched and listened silently to the whole conversations. And those words, those indirect confessions made a strange feeling in her heart, something she had already forgotten long ago.

'_me? Queen? Love me? And still wants Kallen? He's really a warlock, isn't he? What a greed bastard.. but that is just how Lelouch is- I think..' _

Lelouch continued, "I didn't see this coming that I would fall in love with those two. I was a terrible ignorant after all.

But now that I have come to this state, and this situation….

Well, it's true that I loathe myself right now. I killed too many. I am a coward like you said, and

I disgust myself... to talk many lies, to murder…scheme….. and everything… and now there's even a constant mock to my pride as a man, with something too cruel even to be called 'miracle', growing inside of me…

So, just end this tomorrow, Suzaku. A _grandiose_ ending. Then you'll do me a big favour, not only for all citizens and for the sake of the upcoming gentle world, _but for me._ That's if you really do _care _about me." He was about to use the word 'love' to maximize the manipulation effect, but it's just too sickening, so he refrained.

"I love you, Lelouch.", the knight still insisted. Now Lelouch scowled witnessing how dumb his best friend was. He just spoke those words…but Suzaku didn't get it?! _Is that even brain inside that thick skull?_

_Stop that! Stop saying those filthy words! _It sent chills to his spine. "Don't you have honour? A trace of dignity, Suzaku?!", he shouted back.

Suzaku said nothing.

Lelouch shrugged. Man, his friend was really _twisted_ behind that innocent-naïve face.

The nightmare then flashed back vividly.

-scene one;

/The cave : He was running away desperately in that cave which bore the geass code. Panic ensued. And, Suzaku was there. , revealing his perfect disguise, _in front of _Kallen, his beloved Kallen. His former best fried tried to kill him, shot him right on his head. Then…. It was blurry. /

-scene two :

/ he was handed to Charles Zi Brittania, his _father_ whom he despised. Why didn't he die? Why? Suzaku shot him. Blurry events./

-scene three:

/Schneizel. His brother whom he respected a lot when he was a little kid. A true genius. A brother figure whom he didn't despise./

And the rest of scene he suppressed not to remember.

It was hell.

It was traumatizing and made him confused.

True, it was Schneizel's fault, and his father was just trying to protect him. Charles zi Brittania did not do anything wrong, but it's just natural for Lelouch to blame everything that went wrong in his life on him. He refused to acknowledge the truth, and believed Charles was the _very_ person he despised, the centre of his tragic life.

What Lelouch didn't know was the fact that his so called brother, whom he adored when he was still an innocent little prince of Britannia, was also harbouring a sick psychological trait behind that mask of grace and intellects.

_=i=_

[ start : 'The Scene Lelouch-did-not- Know']++-/

/

Prince Schneizel vi Britannia, the 2nd prince of Britannia, was furious behind that cold mask, walking alone in the Palace. Yet, his anger was oblivious to see.

_Is it true that Father harbours Lelouch now? Protecting him?_

…_..I had this assumption that he's the Zero people talk about. Although I was not sure and lack of evidence, the pattern was exactly Lelouch. He used to play chess with me after all;. an excellent player indeed._

_And Father's action recently just proving my assumption is true. Zero is Lelouch._

Schneizel had always had the ambition for the throne. He knew that Charles zi Brittania would give it to him eventually. He was perfect. He was brilliant, and calm, and could do anything. People praised him. He deserved for the throne. He knew it. Even Charles knew it.

But, with Lelouch came back into the picture…

He had always knew his favourite little brother when he was kid, was actually had a matching talent with him. They both inherited the best genes Charles had. He was his _rival_. It was as if looking at his own duplicate, and it made him restless, because just one Schneizel could exist in this world.

Yet, he did not bother before, because Lelouch and Nunally were then exiled. He even pitied the poor boy and his sister. He once loved them both. They just had different mothers, that's all.

But Lelouch vi Brittania was wicked and dangerous, and Schneizel had always known that.

Now that kid had already found a rebellion to rebel against the holy kingdom… it seems like a threat.

He then simply wanted Lelouch, his former beloved brother, to demise, once he realized that Charles had always protected the boy. Charles, yes, his father, did not love his mother as much as he loved that wench, Marianne. As he grew older, Schneizel found out that the only love for the king was Marianne, and he conspired with her, to create their own version of the perfect world.

Young-teenager- Schneizel began to harbour immature jealousy toward Lelouch that his _father _would gladly destroy everything to protect him and his sister, and _that Marianne._ O, how Schneizel actually despised that beautiful Lady whom people loved so much.

Charles threw away Schneizel's mother and get her assassinated.

Yet, Charles loved Marianne so much.

But Schneizel still managed. He could still accept.

After all, he was The Emperor-to-be, and a mighty king could not live without doing any dirty things. He shut his eyes blind, and decided to forgive Charles, pretending not to care. Pretending to learn to be _wise._

But then,

Even, all of the assassination of Marianne and exile of Lelouch was all fabricated lies, all well-prepared..

And now, after Zero did all mundane things, Charles still _saved_ him, and _forgave him_, even tried to manipulate his memories to _protect _him. That's what he said.

_To protect him._

All of dirty things Schneizel did for his father….. all were _in vain_. Charles did not care.

"Your Majesty, I heard that Lelouch….."

"Yes, it's true. But none of this tiny fact will leak. Now, dismiss."

"….He's here then…Hm….,_Father,_ why does he still alive then? Why don't give him a proper punishment? He's dangerous, I don't think it is wise to let him alive."

"He's just a twisted kid. Reckless. I don't see he's dangerous, immature yes, but not dangerous. Without his memory, what could he do? He'll be an average school boy. Don't you see? Price of every life doesn't t equal. He's your brother."

_What? After all he did? He just forgives Lelouch? After killing a lot of innocent lives, committing massacre, killing Clovis and EUPHY?! He said that Lelouch's life is far more precious than his citizens? Than all those people he killed? More than Clovis, Euphemia, and Me? He just protects him all the time. It's sickening._

"why are you still standing here? Do you object me, Schneizel?"

"….no, Your Majesty. I'll excuse My Self,then."

Schneizel realized then, it was clear, for Charles zi Brittania, only himself, Marianne, and her children that mattered. Everything else was just tools for Charles, including _him._

Lellouch didn't have to kill Euphy. (Euphemia. Dear Euphemia.)

Lellouch didn't have to kill Clovis. (The innocent Clovis. That man was not even his rival. He was too naïve comparing to Lellouch. He was stupid, and just loved paintings and arts, but he was not a bad person.)

Probably Schneizel would forgive.

So, he tried to vent his anger by a cowardly sickening method to crush the mirror image of him, Lelouch vi Brittania. Because Schneizel just could not fight his father, the Emperor.

He would kill Lelouch _later_, it could wait. But his soul must be shattered first…. before Charles sent him back to his _old life_.

If he had cracked, Charles would eventually throw him anyway.

Yet, all of torturing methods were _fruitless._

That boy was weak physically, yet he was just too strong in will power. He didn't break. Too much willpower, indeed. He was too confident, brilliant, and he could really manage his mental states really well. He didn't crack. He didn't lose his sanity, after all tortures.

And if Charles found out his most trusted person was toying with his _son_, Schneizel would be doomed. He got His Majesty's trust for almost everything after all, and it came with a _big _price when you decided to do something displeasing him. So, he tried to use another sickening methods that came to mind.

-/-/-/-

"Is it possible,Lyold?"

"yes, Your Highness, it is worth to try. I am curious to prove my thesis. Few shots from my lab, and a change of perception, and _his _own geass…. Would do the trick."

"hmm… do your best then."

"so, I assume, I can use No. 6 subject? Then we could lead his consciousness to condemn himself. Geass has an amazing power after all. And his manipulating power, I wonder if it would also mutate the genes."

"then we can prepare soldiers of fine geass user, and a high-class superpower mutant, that is what you're saying? And even heal uncured disease? Making new weaponry technology into much more different level?", Schneizel said those lies. _Dream on, Llyold, you sick scientist._ "hmm, he's all yours then. A good guinea pig. Just be sure he doesn't die." _Yet. _

The idea of humiliating him this way was entertaining, truly exhilarating.

"Thank you, Your Highness. Umm… ah,Your Highness, Prince Schneizel,.. Do you happen to have a …umm….candidate yet, Your Highness? Then we can conduct it."

"…Well, I find a certain new Knight of Rounds, the Knight of Seven, to be a perfect candidate. He bowed himself in front of His Majesty after all, not knowing his place. What gut he has for an eleven."

"….Kururugi?" _well, what a small world._

Schneizel smiled. Behind that cold façade, he was actually a bit over-dramatic like Lellouch. He had a knack on over-dramatic things too. Just like Clovis. A _filthy eleven_…. Lellouch's best friend, and _rival…_

Amusing. That added more drama.

-/-

-/-

Meanwhile…,

Lellouch felt as if times were stop. All of never ending tortures that drove him faint and almost insane. Wake up, hurt, and haunted, and fainted, and wake up again. He was always frail since he was kid. He's weak, and he knew that.

Someone clearly wanted him to _give up _and _lost_, but not died yet. But he wouldn't give him that satisfaction. He would rise again. Unfortunately, he couldn't use his geass here, what a frustrating thing. Why couldn't he use it? How could he escape?

_Father! What a disgusting person you are!_

Days have passed but then he found the torment ceased.

They even gave him descent food and all.

He almost gave up though.

But then, he looked _that_ figure by the door.

"Suzaku."

He was solemn.

"why are you here? Why didn't I die?", was the first thing Lelouch said.

"I am now a knight of seven, Lelouch. That is why I am here."

"Brittanian Knight of Seven? After selling your friend, you succumb to Britannia. Disgusting. So, you're my torturer now, huh?"

"…in fact I was sent by Prince Schneizel in the name of His Majesty, to _guard_ you. And like I told you,_ I will change Britannia from inside_."

Yes, Schneizel told Suzaku that he handed Lellouch completely to him. He could do anything to him. He was the one who bring him back to the palace. Suzaku doubt Prince Schneizel knew the identity of Zero, though. Probably only he, Zero himself, and His Majesty Charles who knew the secret. But when he was saying those words, Suzaku knew that Prince Schneizel knew.

"I heard he killed Euphy. Take on your revenge for your beloved princess, I won't stop you. Just be sure he doesn't die or _escape_. I wouldn't cover it for you in front of His Majesty otherwise.", that's what Prince Schneizel said to him.

Lelouch laugh in sarcasm. That brought Suzaku back to reality.

"_answer me!_ why did kill you Euphy?! YOU! The very existence of yourself is _the error itself_!", his eyes was full of hatred. "I can't believe you deceived us all! You _deceived me!_ Euphemia is_ your_ sister!", Suzaku shouted. He really despised this man before him.

"Kill me then. It is must be very difficult to you, to be assigned to _guard_ the person you want to kill most in this world, Suzaku. That is Charles Zi Brittania for you.", Lelouch answered _very_ calmly.

"Don't ever dare talk about his Majesty that way, you _filth!_"

And so, the form of torture Lelouch even failed to imagine began.

_**OooO**_

-/-/-/

-/-/-/

-/-/-

It was endless torture, but then suddenly everything seemed peaceful for Lelouch Lamperouge.

It was a flowery field…. Right, Disgusting as it sounded.

'_Hey, this is clearly disgusting'._

'who are you?'

'_who am I?Lelouch vi Brittania of course, an 11__th__ prince, the mighty Zero. The most genius person on earth.'_

'who are you?'

[Flash!]

She was sweet, just like Nunally, just like Mother.

Long hair…

Beautiful.

Sweet smiles.

'_hey, wait! Is this some kind of comedy? A sick parody? I refuse to admit!'_

Sweet smiles, beautiful long raven hair,

So peaceful.

Holding a bouquet of carnations and roses.

'_what? What kind of humiliation is this?'_

Not dirty. Not even murdering any insects. So why bother to scheme and do massacres?

'_hey, where am I? if this is parody, this is not even funny.'_

She cooked, knitted, and smiles. A very peaceful world, just like a beautiful painting.

There was river.

'_cut this out! I command you to stop!'_

'_who am I?'_

'well,see.. who are you? Don't you think it would be much more…. _less_ _disgusting_ too if you were a woman?'

'_a sick attempt indeed…ha…ha…ha… a sick attempt.'_

Terrifying horror ensued.

Replayed and replayed again, much cheesier in every turns.

'a sick attempt? Are you sure?'

'This is heaven.'

'_who are you?'_

'the question is , who are you?'

Sweet lullabies… changed into horror….changed into sweet lullabies… the river… the sweet picture of flower field… the horror…the lullabies… the torture… happiness… peaceful.. torture…

Then… it had become a sacred place to escape reality his subconscious made without his consent. Lelouch preferred _this _reality.

'_Which one is reality?'_

'a sick attempt, are you sure?'

'_no, stop this.. this is not real.'_

…

….

'who are you?'

'_no one. Nothing. I am nothing.'_

….replayed and replayed.

…..replayed and replayed.

'well,see.. who are you? Don't you think it would be much more…. _less_ _disgusting_ too if you were a woman?'

'a sick attempt, are you sure?'

.

..

…..

'…_true, I'm sure it'd be much more less disgusting and peaceful, if I were...'_

…

The geass worked on him. His own geass.

.

/… time passed by../

/-/

/-/

"the geass reacted, he must have had geassed himself! It's a success, Your Highness! See the progress?"

"well done then."

"well, actually I kind of sick regarding the style this Subject No.6 use to hypnotize his subs consciousness. It's hilarious. Yet, her geass is powerful. Even it cracked the most stubborn person on earth. His Highness Lellouch is indeed an interesting subject. But that No.6 subject, the girl.."

"that kid is just a 6 years-old girl after all. She could not fantasize anything better. Ah, kill the girl now. She's a fail experiment after all."

"excuse me, Your Highness?"

"she is to dispose, Llyold. She's useless. That is a failed geass. A useless one. Oh, I almost forgot, how about that Knight Kururugi? The eleven?"

"…..He didn't know we use him. He did everything on his own accord, Your Highness."

"hm.., good. He doesn't need to know anything. He's a bit…_slow, _yet impulsive_. _You better seal your lips, although I've heard he's some kind of your favourites, regarding the Knightmare Frames you built. Now, dismiss. I'd like to have some private time, here."

"understood, Your Highness.", he then left.

Lellouch was alone in his big-yet solemn-room, his_ prison_. The all-white big room that could drive you insane. He was being chained right now, probably they thought he would escape somehow, between this visit.

"Hello, _brother. Awake _now_?_"

"You-! Once I escape, I'll kill you! Mark my word, Scneizel! I, Lelouch vi Britannia will kill you!"

"hm… take it easy, Lelouch…still dare to pull a stunt? You never learn to be calm, don't you?", he smiled, he wore that expressionless, his famous "prince" face, the brilliant prime minister's face. "….Lelouch, see that shape over there? Now you're a perfect human.", he mocked. "a womb.", he laughed. "-and_ its friends! _Complete with the tracts and all.", he laughed.

What choice of words a nobleman like him was using. Really, Schneizel had so many faces.

"you're disgusting, Schneizel! What are you trying to pull out?"

"hmm… this is just to entertain my boring days, you see.. don't flatter yourself, Lelouch. This is just a game. And don't forget, this is your wish. You _geass-ed_ yourself. Not me, little brother."

"you're sick. You were not this _twisted._"

"in times.. you'll change. And you'll lose your identity. No traces of the arrogant Lellouch vi Brittania we knew. You'll be confused of who you are, and trapped between delusions and realities.

"heh, do you think I believe you?", Lelouch mocked, and smirked.

But then he fainted. He's weak indeed.

-/-/-

**OooO**

Days passed.

What everlasting torture for Lelouch.

Fortunately, before the experiment progressed too much, The Emperor found out.

At least, Lelouch was still Lelouch when he found out.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING WITH _MY LELLOUCH_, SCHNEIZEL!_"_, the Emperor found out. He screamed in that big luxurious room. He slapped Schneizel. He was truly angry.

"you, spiteful child! I am truly disappointed! You are much better than this! You are my proud son, my heir! How can you turn so despicable like this?! Explain!"

Schneizel was lost at words.

"I tried to hide all your dark deeds so far. I have never wanted another soul, any single person to know your twisted mind! Now you're loitering yourself with your dirty deeds. This is your _little _brother!"

"I don't want him to become my enemy that I need to eliminate. Another sister, I can endure."

"YOU'RE SICK! DO you think this is a sickening comedy? Try to reason in much more logical way like the great Schneizel should have! You're a _Prime Minister ! _You're just envy, are you? Scared that your rights to be the Emperor will be snatched by him? Desperate because you can't kill him because of me? Your _rival_ in everything? Aren't you too old for that? This scandal! Schneizel, you really have split personalities! I have done so much in these past years to cover it up for you….for any messes you made when you're not in your right mind. Why don't you change? "

"I inherit it from you father. This so called split and twisted personalities I have."

"Silence! It was _your mother_ who was wicked, the one who betrayed me long ago_. You-?!_ but I still forgave you and always protected you! Because you _are my son!_ Now, this is- this is. ..! this treason is too much! If anyone found out about this scandal, how could they respect you? Cornelia? Your loyal subordinates that praise you? You _fool!_ Your people?! Now spite out names those involved in this incident, Schneizel!"

So did Schneizel do what he was told.

"F-Father-"

He thought he was going to be murdered. But what Charles did was just simply erased his memory and instructed him to leave.

"Forget everything. You are my son after all. You... will always be that perfect Schneizel everyone knows. Forget everything, My Son."

Charles knew that all of his children, nothing had the perfect mental health, they were disturbed psychologically, at least slightly. All of them.. .were likely had some kind of personality disorders, or mental abnormalities. The narcissistic and flamboyant-over dramatic Clovis, the twisted yet genius Schneizel, the overdramatic-and-paranoid- neurotic- little Lelouch. The girls were also had their issues. Even Nunnally and Euphy weren't _that innocent _as it seems. But they would change eventually. Charles thought that even VV, his brother, was not that _normal_ after all. He too, had his issue.

Charles looked at his younger son, and approached the pitiful person he loved, gently. He was truly crushed, and beaten, and seems really crumbled into pieces, physically, and mentally. Lelouch screamed and cried in horror, anger, frustration, and complete desperation, in half conscious state.

"my Son, what horrible things just Schneizel did to you? It's alright now… it's alright now, My Son…you'll forget everything.", he hugged him gently as a father, used his geass on him gently, and manipulated his memory. He just needed to restore the boy's health first, and then sent him away to protect him, back to Ashford Academy, as average student.

"just wait a little longer.. when my perfect plan with Marianne become fruitful, everything… the world I and Marianne longed for… dreamed of… will become reality. We'll be together, all of us, even Euphy and Nunally. All in supreme happiness. Now, you better off without knowing you're Zero. Live, Lellouch! Live! Until I and Marianne successful, you'll just need to live there normally. But, if you happened to remember yourself as Zero, I couldn't avoid to kill you, My Son."

_I cannot show that I am favouring you too much. It'll create unnecessary conflict. That is why, Rollo will assassinate you if you remember your mundane acts as Zero._

_As a King, I have to be fair._

Emperor Charles zi Britannia didn't know that although Lelouch was still appeared normal like Lelouch he knew, Schneizel had left him something that made Lelouch not perfectly the same Lelouch anymore. He'd changed in some parts. Meanwhile, Schneizel didn't have any single clue of what he had done. In fact, after his memory being erased by his father, he had gone back to the 'perfect', well-collected, incredibly, mature, wise, calm, genius, Prince Schneizel everyone knew and adored.

"You see and hear everything, don't you, Suzaku Kururugi, the Knight of Seven?...now it's time for you to forget everything.", Charles zi Britania approached the young man and manipulated his memory.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo/ -end of 'The Scene Lellouch didn't know'. 

"you are my best friend, and that is all. I see this conversation will never end; I 'll take my leave now, Suzaku. As Lelouch vi Brittania, I commanded you to live, didn't I? so, live on, that is my last message. And for now, as the absolute King of Brittania, I command you to protect Nunnally for the rest of your life. Bow now, kneel, take a bloody oath in front of me, Suzaku Kururugi."

Suzaku bowed and knelt down, "I, Suzaku Kururugi, the Knight of Zero, is at your service, Your Majesty. I will take that responsibility. I will protect Nunnally with my life. I _will_ protect the gentle word you create."

"Good. Don't follow, I need my time alone.", Lellouch turned away and leaving the place. "it's farewell, then.", he mumbled. He felt terribly sick. Dizzy. Tired. Uncomfortable. Nausea.

_That idiot. I am gambling right now. There is tiny possibility I'll live. My goal is to create a gentle world where Nunnally could smile, not just pure suicidal attempt to run away from reality, nor that I am altruistic enough to sacrifice myself. This parade is needed. I need to vent all the hatred toward me. Dying would be nice, but it's not absolute. A salvation and redemption indeed. But, If God is giving me second chance that my calculation is right, I'll live. I'll live without burdens of sins I had done.. and finally, …CC. Yes…, Just wait a little longer, CC. _

It's just several steps Lelouch had, when Suzaku witnessed that figure suddenly collapsed. He ran, approaching the fainted man. CC came out from her hiding and approached them. Then they brought him back to his chamber.

"It appears you failed to persuade him to cancel the Zero Requiem and changed his mind."

"Those words are for you too, CC. You failed."

"That is why, at this rate, don't fail the Zero Requiem, Suzaku. Don't even try.", her eyes threatened Suzaku.

_How could she know anyway? It's supposedly only me and Lelouch knew the plan!_ "of course.", Suzaku answered instead.

**OooO**

**OooOOooO**

-/-

_=The Zero Requiem=_

Lellouch vi Brittania, the 99th emperor, the CEO of Black Knight, chairman of UFN, and Demon King, looked distracted for a second when the Zero figure appeared, ruining the parade. Then smile was on his face, a knowing smile, …..yes, all of his plan was running perfectly.

A_ grandeur_ ending.

An Extraordinary way to commit suicide. Sins free, well-guaranteed.

For the world.

….

.

Suzaku did it.

/"wishes are like Geas, Suzaku."/

/"I accept"/

Swords piercing his flesh, yet he was smiling contently at heart, embracing his true victory. It's just a mere game, a sacrifice for Lelouch Vi Brittania, a redemption. _People need a figure to be blamed and hated, and that will be me. Zero will live forever at people's heart as their hero, the saviour of the world._

"and that is also your punishment, Suzaku, to live forever under the mask, sacrificing your own happiness for the world, as Zero."

He fell. Suzaku felt tears started to blur his sight behind that ridiculous mask. He just killed two people he loved most at this world with his hands. His _happiness_ was a selfish-mischievous King who loved gambling. Ironic, he was sure he hated this man, all about betrayals, all about Euphemia, the angel that he killed… it was really an ironic how he felt nothing close to anger or hatred anymore toward this person who killed the person he supposed to love the most in this world. No. Maybe he had never truly hated this man. He never truly hated Lelouch Lamperouge. Lellouch vi Britannia, whatever the name was.

The figure fell, and landed perfectly at Nunnally's side, smiling, dying in her arms.

"I love you, brother!"

_I know._

"the world will be nothing without you! It's unfair!, o, brother!brother!"

_No, you're wrong Nunnally. You'll be there, happy in your gentle world, as an Empress. You'll get over me, and then Suzaku will be there for you._

'_yes. I have destroyed the world…and created a new one.'_

_I present you the gentle world you and Euphy dreamed about, my dear Nunnally._

Lelouch vi Britannia finally closed his eyes.

Embracing his last victory.

**OooOOooO**

-[PRESENT TIME]-

'So, the Demon King Died. That would be a nice epilogue.

Yes, Q1, I planned it all along. I just think you have the rights to know. After all, what I did to you all were lies.'

"Yes, Lelouch…. Even I know how you manipulated me to push me out, when they found out about your true identity… I was tricked by you, and left you, and now.. this is really not an end I wished for. Probably, if I stayed with you…. There would be a different result? A happier one? "

Kallen Kouzuki couldn't believe what she just read. Tears were start flowing from her eyes. Zero requiem seven years ago…. It was all exactly like what she read. He was… truly a master of manipulation.

_That man… for the world….it sounds exactly like Zero. _Like Lelouch Lamperouge Kallen knew.

'And that would be a perfect ending, right, Q1? I really wish It will turn out that way, although probably there will be minor differences.

Kallen, thank you. If this were a much peaceful world, I had already made you one of my court Ladies. I can't make it this far without you. CC is like my destiny. I love her for what she is, and how she found me, and how she understands me, accepts me as I am. But in the world without meeting CC, the Lelouch Lamperouge had always had his eyes on certain smart yet fragile Kallen Stedfald, but he's just too young to understand that. When you saved me several times, even when you found out my identity… I think, that was when I began to notice you. I fell for you. A perfect strong shield and swords, all packed in one. A meaningless confession, isn't it? I was weak and pathetic, yet I had become strong since I met you.'

_What? damn you! Why does CC have to be the queen and I am just a court lady? This is just like him….._

_But I can't help it. That is the way he is._

'as Zero knight, the Black Knight ace, you have the rights to know the truth, that is why I tell you everything, about Zero Requiem, and all…even that disgusting story. I apologize for my rude behaviour, and lack of leadership, the way I abandoned you and the rebellion, my rush decisions and rude acts in our final moments together, that's because I couldn't think rationally with hormonal imbalance and all that distressing events. It's hard even to eat and sleep.

..

What? No smiles nor laughs?

I see it's a futile attempt to pull out some jokes here.

Well, when this tiny book is in your hand, I assume, I am no longer in this world, Q1, so I don't see any reasons to cover anything with lies. I don't need to feel ashamed either. This is the truth.

See how disgusting I am? No cries or mourns. Now, I command you to move on, live your life. That is an absolute order,Q1. Don't forget to burn this piece of evidence once you finish reading it.

So, my plan is simple. Now you understand why I keep 'Zero Requiem' plan hidden from you? There is a possibility you would interfere like always. I, Lelouch vi Brittania don't regret anything. After all, I have destroyed the world, and create it a new. And die peacefully, if my calculation is right.

**There is tiny possibility I will alive, but, that leaves to CC and her own story.**

**Because this is the story of me, King Lelouch vi Brittania, **

**the 99****th**** emperor who wished to die, for a greater cause. **

**For Nunnally, for you, and for all the people in this world.'**

=Fin=

Seven years have passed. And of course, you did it! You're successful, Lelouch! Now, the world has morphed into a much peaceful and wonderful place. Zero always stayed by Her Majesty Empress Nunnally, like you wished for. And me? I, Kallen Kouzuki, will always be loyal by Zero's side as his knight.

It's cruel of CC though, that I just managed to grab this book after 7 years have passed…

And guess who gave this to me? It's Suzaku Kururugi, the one that supposed to be dead, the new _Zero _right? Lellouch, it's Suzaku Kururugi, not _that _CC.

=Epilogue : Kallen Kouzuki burned the book to ashes, and moved on with her life.=

-/-

**A/N : completely crack and twisted,right? You've been warned.**

Suzaku : "what? Lelouch is pregnant with _MY CHILD?!_" *vomit* "and why does my role become this sickening and lame? I _am _a valiant knight! So naïve, brave, have sense of justice and honour, the true hero of this story… And how about the time line?"

CC :"well, _it_ didn't catch up the normal growth rate, very slow in fact, about 1/6 of normal fetus growth. It's a failed experiment after all. Thankfully, it grew up _normal_, Suzaku. But I love this story, because Lelouch claimed that I am his destiny. That means, I can live for eternity eating pizza from his pocket, _if_ he survived the Requiem,of course."

Kallen :" …hmm, that's explain why he was such a prissy.. but _he IS ZERO! MY HERO! I can't accept! no…! my ZERO!The very reason I live and fight for! the one I'm ready to die for!"_

Lelouch : " I,Lelouch vi Britannia, command you to stop this sickening parody already!"

**R&R,please! Thank you :D**


End file.
